Depressed about America
Hi old hippy im 17 and suffer from what i believe is manic depression. I have deep, prolonged depression that can last for months on end with only weeks or days to break the monotony.
I refuse to seek any psychiatric or medicinal help because of the reason i feel that i suffer from this. My belief is that it stems directly from this life that we are forced to live. I feel that my life is controled by forces i have no control over.
Our government that denies all their individual freedoms as a human, and then has the gull to claim that we are the land of the free. this way of life has created a superficial society that has no idea(nor does it have any interest) in how limited our possible life paths are, due to this and all governments. Safety has become something our nation is willing to trade anything for, and there is so many that feel this way. There is nothing i can do to change any of their minds.
I feel Ignorance is bliss should be our nations moto and it makes me physically ill. I wish i could make everyone open their eyes and see this, they are so convinced that their is no better way to live than with our government, that no one has put the time or effort into creating a new lifestyle, or at least improving (significantly) on the one we have. and i believe its rather comical that we as a nation destroyed what possibly was the most perfect way of life in our earths history.
What was better than how the indians lived, granted they had some basic forms of govt., but i would consider it more as a leadership role than anything. Traveling a beautiful land in a groups consisting of family and friends, living off the land with a devine love for its beauty and appreciation of its gifts to man. they danced, acted, smoked pot, played music, told stories, and were generally peaceful. i think about what it was like and can’t imagine any way to improve on it. instead look around u this life we live is hell, morrison was right, life is the bad part, when you die that all goes away. these thoughts in my head circulate daily and have prevented me from conecting with others, i havnt had a girlfriend in years and all my friendships seem rather superficial.
I’m sorry for having rambled alot but i have trouble expressing the ideas in my head. i really want to know if in your experiences you’ve met anyone with my similar problem/blessing or if you could just give me any advice at all.
I can relate to exactly what you feel. I’ve had the same feelings and doubts about the American way of life for quite sometime (like 30 years). And yes it can be very depressing. However obsessing over this is not healthy.
Manic depression is a clinical diagnosis of a very specific disease. I would hesitate to self-diagnose this unless you’ve consulted medical journals and know exactly what you’re talking about. You don’t mention anything that indicates you get manic, and believe me, if you did, you would know (and so would everyone around you!). Perhaps you just left that out. Do you also go into rages, and talk incessantly about these subjects (regardless of whether anyone is listening)? If so, then you may qualify for the label manic-depressive.
You can break your depression by breaking the monotony in your life. There are many ways to do this. Exercise, travel, new friends, nature all help restore your perspective and add positive experiences to your life. Getting a breath of fresh air is always good. You could even move to another place which can help too. Sometimes there’s environmental factors that make us ill. I discovered that allergies were making me sick and depressing me too. Now I take a pill when I need to, and I don’t have that problem anymore.
I’m finding many hippies are getting very angry and depressed at the state of affairs with the US and the world in general. We are facing imminent ecological, economic and social disasters just by keeping things as they are. But with the threat of war and terrorism and fear mongering, the situation threatens to spiral out of control even before these other disasters come crashing down on us. There is much to worry about.
But lately I’ve come to the realization that all these things will soon become visible and obvious to everyone. Thirty years ago, many wise ones warned us about what was coming, and urged us to change. We didn’t heed the warnings, and now we must pay the price of progress. I believe that by the time I’m in my late sixties (say 15-20 years hence), people will once again be roaming the American countryside in search of food. But it won’t be buffalo they’ll be hunting. Oh, no. Sorry, but I won’t go there right now. There’ll be plenty of time to think about how badly we fucked things up, after the shit hits the fan.
In the meantime, we hippies must rediscover the ways of native americans and those cultures that knew how to live off the land. Time is running out to prepare. Get ready.
Posted by: skip
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